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| A few days ago I've noticed my food was disappearing and my utensils were randomly moving about the kitchen. Need I explain more why I can't stand living with roommates? -_-x Let's refer back to my old entry when I had invited my "friend" over and he randomly took it upon himself to venture into my roommates section of the kitchen and dig into her bag of cake. Not to mention he also stole $10 from me. Yeah, remember that? Well, it happened to me this time. Yay karma! xD My roommate told me today that her drunk friends came over a few days ago and helped themselves into my food. It wasn't anything extreme like I was expecting karma to bring at me. Thank you. I'm most grateful for not having my whole pantry wiped clean or something as drastic. She said she was going to reimburse me for it, let's hope she sticks to her word. Oh man, I'm waiting for the internet impersonation karma to come. That's going to be a woozy. Not to mention I did it twice to Mr. Hoe. I hope it won't be too bad. Any-who, the point of this is that karma is most definitely real and I've experienced it in it's full form yet again. I just don't understand why I'm being cursed in love relationships? I haven't done anything THAT extreme to be cursed with a batch of losers. Have I....?O__o? As a Baptist Christian, or just a Christian in general that believes in God and his rule of conduct, is believing in karma a sin? Because karma is a Buddhist principle of religion. If that's the case what is the Christian equivalent to karma? What is it called? Because I know this concept is in the Bible, but it doesn't have a specific name like Buddhism....? I've studied Buddhists concepts and morals last semester and a little before then(yay for Comparative Philosophy in the East & West!). A few years ago, I was almost converted into this new Japanese religion called "Shinnyoen." xD My mom would've disowned me if I would've went through with that,lol. When I went to the meetings everyone was really nice and showed me what they do in order to "praise and worship" which was chanting. When they explained to me about their teachings and principles it seemed pretty legit. It's a religion based upon karma(which I happen to highly believe in due to experiencing it numerous times), feeding your life experiences and actions with good karma in order to balance out the bad and ultimately try to get rid of all bad karma by reaching Nirvana. They had shown me a video of one of their international ceremonies and the founder of the religion's wife,Tomoji, had purple hair! Ha, nice. I had purple hair for a couple of hot seconds back in my high school days, hehe. Anyway, since the religion is somewhat new I was kind of skeptic about it. When I went to study abroad in Nagasaki and talked to my Japanese Religions professor about it, she even said that the religion is a bit "fishy." I forgot her reasoning for it. Blah, whatever. I will always remain a Christian...in progress. >< | | |
| Ok. Wow I'm so gonna get flammed for this post. Especially if some Asian dudes look at this post. ^^; Ahahahaha well come right on down, I'd love to hear your responses to this because this is just for you. So, for those of you who know about my crazy shenanigans with Japanese dudes already know the deal with me. Ok, so apprently it's not just me having trust and cheating issues with Japanese guys. A friend I know in the JET program is married to a Japanese man. She told me he cheated like effin' crazy on his ex gf before he married my friend so now she's flipping out and checking up on him like a dog. I feel so sorry for her, she seems like a really nice lady.  Another friend of mine dated a Vietnamese man who cheated on his ex gf with my friend and decided he wanted to have his cake and eat it to, meaning he went back to his ex gf afterwards and she accepted him with open arms but claims he's still in love with my friend. But that story gets long and confusing....bottom line, the dude cheated. A girl I met not too long ago is dating a Japanese man who constantly threatens to break up with her whenever he doesn't get his way. That sitaution....I'm not going to even go there. They're both touched.  Another friend of mine was cheated on by her Chinese bf by her supposedly "friend." Of course that's another story within itself. I know what you're thinking, ok, my black friend, or my white friend or hispanic friend cheated on so-and-so. Yes. People are people. Cheaters, idiots, and whores know no skin-tone, race, ethnicity, or size. The point here is that I've noticed a trend with a lot of Asian men cheating on their gfs. I know this sounds racists but I've seen and have experienced some valid points to confirm this theory, which is why I'm writing this!! Those of you who ARE Asian or are like me that are Asian Studies majors or just so happen to be interested in Asian cultures know exactly what I'm talking about with this. As well as other points such as Asian beat-around-the-bush methods, tatemae(Japanese), and basically just making simple situations complicated for no reason.....method. I think it's because they have such a low self-esteem that they feel the need to cheat with other women. Also, for Japanese men---I think it's hereditary for them to cheat!!!! REALLY! I've even brought this up to my Japanese guy friends. And no not all of them are hosts, but college students, teachers, computer egineers, bussinessmen, etc. and THEY'VE EVEN AGREED THAT THE CHEATING PERCENTAGE IN JAPAN IS HIGH!! Which is one of many reasons why Cabaret Clubs exists..? Even if a man goes to a hostess club that's still considered cheating in my book. If you're rubbing all up on some other woman that's not your gf or wife....it's cheating. Am I wrong? Japanese men and Asian men in general don't seem to care about the other person's feelings. That's one thing I cannot do is leave a chapter open with someone and move on to the next. If I start developing feelings for someone I'm going to tell the other person I'm with, end it properly, and move on to the next. Another thing is Japanese & Asian men are WEAK!!! They can't handle a woman who speaks her mind!! They want someone who goes along with their BS with no complaints or questions asked. I'm sure as hell am not even close to being a ghetto black chick....but I will bring that out of me if need be. lol I will "take option # 2" as my friend would say lol. Seriously though, I have yet to meet an Asian man who can meet my standards. I'm not a hard woman to please and I don't make unreasonable requests. I'm a woman of logic and reasoning. And the shit I've been through...oh my goodness! If you only knew! My entries don't even portray half of the crazy shenanigans these dudes say to me whenever I call them out! Wow. I'm getting fired up right now. Moving along.... I know Japanese & other Asian cultures are different from American culture. But my goodness, common sense is universal. Oh my...if you guys only knew. Anyway, getting off task again,lol. I know it seems as if I'm being bitter from my past relationships. But no! That's not it at all..ok a little bit,lol. But no, other people that I'm acquainted with have been going through the SAME THING or worse with these dudes. Yes, there are all different types of people in different cultures, race,etc. but I've yet to meet a pure bred Japanese man to smash my theory of them being weak and cheaters. Yes, it's harsh and I know I'll get comments from people saying "Well what if I say all black girls are loud, ghetto, and ugly!" Be my guest because that just shows you didn't read this post correctly and you fail at reading & comprehension. For future references, because I know I'm gonna get these as well....YES I'VE DATED OTHER THAN JAPANESE & ASIAN MEN. So, my question is do you think it's true that Asian men are more prone to cheat? Do you think Asian men are more attracted to women who do not voice their opinions? | | |
| This movie I just watched was absolutely touching and brought up another sense of reality that a majority of people tend to avoid or miss altogether: "Taking responsibility for your actions." Very true. The story is about 3 young boys who bullied a kid in high school. One of the kids did the ultimate bullying of all; being the person's friend and laughing at him when a joke was told, then making him do something for him. Knowing what he was doing to that poor kid and ignoring it was the ultimate disgusting thing you could do to another human being. The stuttering teacher made him realize that forgetting it ever happened is the wrong way to go about the situation, and basically any life situation. "Don't forget, remember, take responsibility, learn, and continue living. " As for my situation right now(oh you know I was going to throw in one of my Japanese ex bf situations lol), my ex has written me an e-mail once again to apologize. The last time he wrote me and tried to talk to me he had told me the only reason why he started talking to me was to find out if the rumors about me were true. Disgusting. Now, he writes me again claiming he'll come see me next year. He's good for talking big but never showing any action. Two times in a row with 2 different people I've been mislead and spat on for no reason. Was there a reason for this constant treachery? If there was, I'd like to know now so I can atone for them. Why should I trust him? He's deceived me before. We all know the sayings, "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me....fool me a third time.......... you just fail." xD I don't understand these ring-around-the-rosey mind games. I'm a person of logic, reasoning, and blutness. Is that bad? In my younger days(lol I sound like I'm 70 yrs. old) I was so quiet and let people trample all over me and now that I'm actually stepping up I'm being proclaimed as too brash and unreasonable. What? Why? What is this? I refuse to be not heard anymore, to remain silent. If I have something to say I will say it this time. I'm not afraid anymore. Because in the past years I've learned that my opinions are worth just as much as anyone else's, if not that then more. So why should I reamin silent? Call me what you want, but I will not remain a piece of furniture in the background. One day....I will be known(for doing something good, not stabbing a school of people or shooting them in the mouth xD). I refuse to die in the shadows. I refuse to be your dirty little secret. I refuse to be mistreated when I treat you with utmost respect. I refuse to be your "Plan B." I refuse to be a bum with no goal, no voice, no future. I refuse to shed a tear for you...who does not deserve it. | | |
| Everyday we, as individuals, are being interviewed. Interviewed by family, friends, strangers, lovers, and of course potential employers. For example when you find a potential lover you do what? Go on a date. That date is the interview. If they don't pass, they don't get a second date nor a phone call, right. If the person passes the interview then the person will go on to the second stage of the interview process which is a second date, third, fourth, etc. (depending on the person of course) then the next stage is the "official dating" stage. During the "official dating" stage the interview continues. The final stage for me is 5 or more years within a stable relationship. What does marriage mean to me? To me marriage is the final results of taking the interview( official dating) and passing the final exam(stability). A majority of human social behavior has thought of marriage as part of the interview and final exam. No. Why waste your time? And especially your money!? The whole point of dating is to see if the person is worthy enough to be marriage material(the exam/ interview). The results of that interview and exam should be marriage. Of course everything on this planet is dynamic, especially human beings. Consistent happiness is quiet impossible to maintain, give, and recieve to or by another human being. I'm not at all saying that by doing things this way you can obtain true happiness. However, it can definitely increase your percentage of knowing what lies ahead. Bascially, date longer. Feel the person out. Then marry. If you've read my previous entries I know you're thinking practice what you preach. Well...you live and you learn. :/ | | |
| Why do humans choose paths that they already know the outcome to? They already know what lies ahead, yet they still take it. Last night a few buddies and myself decided to do some prank IMing to 2 of my ex's(Mr. Host and another Japanese fool). This time I pretended to be a white American suicide girl model who was completely dumbfounded of the Japanese language. It worked. As usual. So the fools took the bait and my buddies investigated the crap out of them, I sat back watching the two fall into the trap. Mr. Host surprisingly this time was not so enthused about meeting a new attractive female on skype. Usuallly he would be anxious and randomly send out his photo to his new friend. But he didn't. He had an aurora in his IM which conveyed he wasn't "himself." He also asked about how Americans have relationships. After 5 minutes within the conversation the tattoed model asked Teru if he had a gf, he said no and that he used to be in love with an American girl. I asked that we should specifiy because who knows how many "American girls" he had encountered during his time of knowing me, before, and after. He then said a "black American girl."  I was stunned. Was this another trick? Did he know that I was once again playing CIA agent with him on skype? We then investigated further, he replied that he "didn't know the details and forgot." Which basically translates as "I know what happened, but I don't feel like explaining because you'll probably agree that I'm an asshole." To make a long story short, he said that I'm not "Corporate President Wife material." Because his wife would have to trust him and I'm not a "reasonable woman." No, I'm not the type of woman to submit to anyone's bullshit...that's all that is. What he did was wrong no matter how many angles and perspectives you look at it. If I never found out the truth about his ex gf/pending wife, what would that have made me? If I would've remained dumbfounded of the situation, would I have just been one of his play toys whenever his real gf or wife isn't around or isn't acting "reasonable" towards him? I refuse to be the "other woman." I am one in a million, not one of a million. I would like to be treated as such. Why is that so hard to ask? | | |
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